Thursday, November 13, 2014

Listen

I want to thing about the things that i've done and the things that I want to do but recently i'm out of nowhere. I have no want to talk about what I really feel. I'm in a relationship with my boyfriend and the father of my child but I can't talk to him. I can't get angry of him. I'm forbidden to make him see how I feel. It's not healthy and i'm not happy. I want to speak how I feel. I want to make things, or do things or a lot. But you see I can't. He has never welcomed the lost girl in me.

Last night was supposed to be a very busy night for me. Making props and fixing materials for the seminar today. Yet he choose to just let our baby walk around, get involve on what im doing and him just sit at the corner watching movie. He always say he supported me, and I didn't feel a thing. Every time im with the group he just sit and talk less or talk nothing. He looks grumpy or mad. I don't see support on that. I want to be happy and helping others make me happy. On the other hand he wants to but he don't see any good on what I do. How ironic. He wants to help with money, if he have money. People dont need money to learn they need their inner self kicked and be awaken.

Clifford is someone I learned to love. He was a friend. We rush things over to a relationship that we are too grounded to open things. I think I deserved to be listened to.